5 years old

Five years ago today our beautiful baby boy was born. I still can't believe it. As I write this sipping on my second cup of coffee, the girls are sleeping and Beckett is watching Shark Tale. I continue to glance over at him and marvel at his perfection. I'm not sure he understands that it's his birthday but that's okay, his sister Zoë does and she's been itching to open his presents for him. Before the chaos of the day begins though, it's just me and my boy...he has his movie and cars and I have my coffee. Beckett is an early riser and as much as I dislike 5  hours sleep, I have learned to savour the quiet morning hours with my oldest child.

This past year has been a big one for Mr. B, he is walking better and talking more. There are still some challenges, we continue to learn as we go and we are so excited for him to start Kindergarten in September...excited and totally scared at the same time!

I love this photo, this is when B first started to walk....I'm just noticing the sign behind him - a joke from a friend and no longer in our yard! Beckett now prefers to run and he is fast. He gives the best hugs, has the sweetest laugh and his empathy and compassion is extraordinary. I have learned more from him in the past five years than I ever thought possible.

We call him our "Beckett Bundle"...he is a bundle of love, laughs and wonder. Yesterday we spent three hours at Children's Hospital, he had his ears cleaned out (a miserable experience) a blood test and an x-ray to check for Atlantoaxial instability. It was a brutal morning but these are the things we have to do every now and then.

I could go on and on about my relationship with Beckett....but the relationship that Dave has with his boy is beyond special. They are two peas in a pod with an unbreakable bond that's foundation is pure love. The two men in my life are my bright lights.

The girls are waking up now...my quiet time with my five year old is ending....let the beautiful chaos begin. Happy Birthday Beckett, I love you so much. xx

world blood donor day

Every blood donor is a hero. Earlier this year my life was saved by a hero (or heroes) who gave blood. Today is World Blood Donor Day. For more information you can visit the World Health Organization website here. Today I give thanks to the people who give the life-saving gift of blood.  I am forever grateful. xx

happy mother's day

It was such a great day, so sunny & warm - finally!  My mom, mother-in-law & father-in-law came over, the plan was turkey burgers & salad....after a visit to the beach.

Poppy sat in one spot and didn't move, she picked up her sister's sunglasses and her shovel and she got down to some beach business. It was good.

Zoë is also fond of digging, she stalked a family who had dug a massive hole in the sand. As soon as they left to go home, Zoë moved in...it was tough to convince her to share her find.

My boy rocked the beach, he went in the water - fully clothed. He barely sat still, it was such a good time.This is B in the car to come home...he was so tired!

My mom is such a beauty in this photo, when I see myself in this photo now I see Zoë - it's amazing, even the look on my face in this photo is all Zoë. Love the wood paneling.This is my fourth Mother's Day...I think this one was the best. Maybe it's because this year has been such a tough one, when your health gives you a good scare you can't help but slow it down and really take stock of what you have to be grateful for.

I can't believe my boy is going to be five this August, how time flies by. I love this photo. I was so excited to be a mom. Beckett was the best baby and although we were at first surprised & sad to discover he had Down syndrome, it didn't last for long - that's pure joy on my face in this photo. I feel extreme love every time I look at him, I'm lucky to be his mama.

I dyed my hair dark when I went on maternity leave with Miss Z, I eventually went back to blond but now that I take a look at this picture I kinda like the shiny dark hair! When Zoë came along we were so excited, a baby girl - Dave always joked that he hoped she would look like me but act like him. My friends think that's hilarious. The joke is on Dave though, Zoë looks like me and acts like me, she is my mini-me....and I love it.

And then came Poppy. This girl started out with so much black hair, now she's the fairest of them all. With her beautiful blue eyes, light brown hair & ivory skin she melts my heart....and she's so sweet & easygoing - a lot like her Daddy.

I love being a mother. I had a great day with my family. Happy Mother's Day to you...I hope your day was lovely.

xx

you go girl

We went to the Farmer's Market the other day. Miss Z dressed herself, I suggested that the sunglasses, headband and scarf might be too much. She disagreed. I love that she needed to try all of the dried fruit samples before choosing the cherries. You go girl.

world down syndrome day

Today is the 7th anniversary of World Down Syndrome Day, for the first time in 2012 this day will officially be observed by the United Nations. Each year the voice of people with Down syndrome and those who live and work with them grows louder...but there is still much more that we can do.

When Beckett was born and we discovered that he had Down syndrome I was scared. My fear was based on the unknown, I really didn't know anything about Trisomy 21. I do now, like every other parent with a child with Down syndrome, I'm an expert! Down syndrome doesn't define Beckett, he's a boy that loves his family, cars, trains, movies and the park - he also happens to have an extra chromosome.
When Beckett was born I was constantly told what he wouldn't be able to do, it's such a shame that the beginning was so tainted with negativity. When I talk to new parents I tell them how wonderful our son is and how one day Down syndrome really won't cross their mind when they think of their child. It's true. Beckett does everything his sisters do, it takes him a little longer but that's okay.
Look at that boy in the photos above, I don't see Down syndrome, I don't see what he can't do. I see a ridiculously cute boy, who is full of love - like his sisters, he is pure joy. I can't wait to see what he achieves.
Happy World Down Syndrome Day.

i can see clearly now....

I feel like 2012 hasn't really started for me, I have spent most of the year recovering both physically and emotionally from emergency surgery. When something traumatic happens you can't help but think about what's most important to you. Your perspective changes, priorities are clear. I have spent the last while making a list of things I want to do, it's a good list....a sweet list to make. I want to collect my gramma's recipes, make a photo book of the kids, read more books, organize the attic, bake more, write more - it's a long list of things I actually want to do. In the last couple of months we have visited the park more, I learned how to make ravioli (my favourite food) & we go for more walks. I have even baked - which I'm not good at but the kids love it and so do I.  The photo of Zoë holding the cupcake is so sweet, right after the photo was snapped she dropped the cupcake and Stanley ate it - wrapper and all - in 2 seconds flat.  We laughed our heads off. Bring on 2012.

i'm back....

I'm heading back to work tomorrow (Monday March 5). It's been over 10 weeks since I last anchored the news. These last two months have been physically exhausting and emotionally draining. I'm feeling good now. I'm strong, I have perspective.
I'm still taking baby steps, I'm going back to work four days a week for the first month and will then evaluate my stamina with my doctor.
I will share more details about my journey soon, I'm still absorbing it all and trying to understand what it all means and how it has changed me. There's no doubt that this has been a life altering experience. I have many people to thank...it's overwhelming.
Let me start with this - thank you to everyone who send me an e-mail, a message on Facebook, a tweet on Twitter or stopped me on the street to say a kind word and wish me well. Your words and concern are so appreciated...random notes of kindness from people I have never met - I love that.  Thank you.  See you tomorrow on CTV News at 6....I'm so excited to be back. xx